TL;DR
Research from The Gottman Institute emphasizes that emotional literacy—the ability to identify and articulate feelings—is foundational to improving emotional intelligence. Practicing this skill can lead to healthier relationships and better emotional regulation.
The Gottman Institute states that emotional literacy—the ability to identify, name, and express feelings—is the essential first step in developing emotional intelligence, a skill that can be learned at any age and significantly enhances relationship quality.
According to The Gottman Institute, emotional intelligence involves perceiving, understanding, and managing emotions in oneself and others. While often associated with traits like empathy and self-awareness, these are built on the foundational skill of emotional literacy—namely, recognizing and verbalizing feelings accurately.
Research indicates that many adults have a limited emotional vocabulary, defaulting to vague terms like “fine” or “stressed.” The Institute offers tools such as the Emotional Literacy guide to help individuals expand their emotional vocabulary and practice naming feelings clearly. This practice enables better communication, emotional regulation, and stronger relationships.
Practicing emotional literacy involves turning feelings into words, which then allows for attunement—staying present with a partner’s emotional state—and structured practice through tools like relationship coaching and expressive card decks. These small, repeated exercises are shown to produce meaningful change over time, making emotional intelligence a teachable skill rather than an innate trait.
Why Emotional Literacy Is Key to Relationship Success
Building emotional literacy provides a practical, accessible way for adults to develop emotional intelligence, which is crucial for healthy relationships, effective communication, and emotional regulation. The Institute notes that these skills are not fixed; they can be cultivated through consistent practice, leading to calmer, more connected interactions and fewer misunderstandings.
This approach shifts the focus from abstract traits to concrete skills, making emotional intelligence achievable for everyone. Strengthening emotional literacy can also contribute to improved mental health by reducing conflicts and fostering a sense of safety and understanding in personal relationships.
The Empathy Set: Definitions Edition – 112 Feelings and Needs Flash Cards for Emotional Literacy & Relational Harmony, User-Friendly Emotional Literacy Cards with Definitions & Four Synonyms
- Easy Identification of Feelings: Clear definitions and synonyms on each card
- Supports Meaningful Conversations: Boosts emotional literacy and confidence in communication
- Enhances Emotional Awareness: Builds self-awareness and strengthens relationships
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The Foundation of Emotional Skills Development
The concept of emotional intelligence was introduced in 1990 by psychologists Peter Salovey and John D. Mayer and popularized by Daniel Goleman. It encompasses the ability to perceive, understand, and manage emotions, which has been linked to success in relationships, work, and personal growth.
Recent research from The Gottman Institute emphasizes that emotional literacy—the capacity to recognize and articulate feelings—is the practical core upon which emotional intelligence is built. While many adults struggle with limited emotional vocabularies, evidence shows that these skills can be taught and improved at any age through deliberate practice.
Tools such as the Institute’s Emotional Literacy guide and structured exercises like expressive card decks are designed to help individuals expand their emotional vocabulary and develop attunement with others. These methods are supported by research indicating that consistent, small practice sessions produce measurable improvements over time.
“You cannot manage a feeling you cannot name, and most of us carry a smaller feeling-vocabulary than we realize.”
— an anonymous researcher
Uncertain Aspects of Emotional Literacy Development
While evidence supports the effectiveness of practicing emotional literacy, further research is needed to determine how quickly individuals notice measurable improvements and whether certain groups benefit more than others. Long-term effects across diverse populations are also an area for ongoing study.
Next Steps in Promoting Emotional Literacy Skills
The Gottman Institute plans to expand access to their emotional literacy tools and conduct further research on how these skills develop over time. Future initiatives may include targeted programs for couples, workplaces, and educational settings to foster emotional vocabulary and attunement skills at scale.
Key Questions
Can emotional literacy really be learned as an adult?
Yes. Evidence from The Gottman Institute shows that adults can expand their emotional vocabulary and develop emotional intelligence through deliberate practice, making it a teachable skill at any age.
How does emotional literacy improve relationships?
By recognizing and articulating feelings accurately, individuals can communicate more effectively, respond with empathy, and repair conflicts more easily, leading to healthier and more secure relationships.
What practical tools are available to develop emotional literacy?
The Gottman Institute offers resources such as the Emotional Literacy guide, expressive card decks, and relationship coaching programs designed to help individuals practice naming feelings and attunement skills.
Is emotional intelligence a fixed trait or can it be developed?
It is a skill that can be developed through consistent practice. The Institute emphasizes that emotional literacy, in particular, is a foundational skill that improves with repetition and willingness to learn.
Source: The Gottman Institute
